MATEO’S STORY….

Foster fail. The two words I escaped saying for so long. When you foster, it is never about adopting yourself. Actually, quite the opposite. You are in a different head space, your goal is to rescue an animal, get them healthy, vaccinated, spayed/neutered and then find them their perfect forever home.

Of course, I love every single little soul that comes through my door, how can I not? I have a special connection with each and every one of them. But, my goal has always been to say goodbye. That is how I measure my success, how many babies I kiss goodbye. The words “foster fail’ to me, always implied that, you failed at saying goodbye. I have been tempted, on a few occasions to adopt my own fosters, but I knew deep down, their perfect forever was out there… and it wasn’t me. 

And then came Mateo.

Mateo was born in Tijuana, Mexico. He was about eight weeks old when he was found, and about nine weeks old when he finally got to me.

A woman heard a kitten crying all night long, and assumed it was coming from an abandoned house next door. In the morning, she went to investigate and found a kitten stuck in a plastic pipe. Her dog was outside with her, and when she freed the kitten, her dog attacked him. She took him to a neighborhood veterinarian and they did X-rays to see what kind of damage had been done. Once the veterinarian saw that he had nerve damage, and he probably wouldn’t be able to walk again, he recommended euthanasia, I am SO grateful every single day that she said no and decided to look for help for him. (Veterinarians always use the term “quality of life”, implying that his life would be miserable and he was better off dead. WHAT!?!?) The veterinarian gave him an anti-inflammatory and steroid injection, she went home and reached out on social media for help. My friend saw a post on a rescue page on Facebook and contacted me to see if I would be willing to help him. No one was stepping up to help. No one. I think rescues are afraid to step up and help because of he unknown costs of helping a paralyzed or special needs kitten. I wasn’t scared, I wanted to help.

Luckily, a local rescuer was going down to Tijuana that weekend to volunteer at a spay and neuter clinic and offered to transport him back to me. I was so very grateful that I didn’t have to make the 5-6 hour drive to Mexico to get him, but that was the longest weekend of my life. The coordination of getting him and getting him back to me was no small feat. There were several hands involved, and at times it was like that game telephone… the information getting back to me was all second hand. I was desperately trying to get a copy of his X-rays to send to my veterinarian so we could both be prepared. I had no clue the extent of damages or what  I was in for. I don’t think I actually got a copy until I got him. Anyway, the woman transporting him worked tirelessly all weekend at the clinic and started the drive back to las Vegas. I think she  was scheduled to arrive around 11pm, then she hit some delays and was estimating 3am arrival (mind you I had to meet her across town to pick him up, she couldn’t keep him until the next day). Then, she had to pull over to sleep because she was exhausted. FINALLY, at 5am on November 19th, I met her in a parking lot to get him. She opened the car door and I saw these HUGE green eyes staring back at me. He was so scared and confused, my heart broke right there. I got him into my car and just burst into tears. I was overwhelmed with so many emotions. I was so sad for him and how he must be feeling.. scared and all alone, I was terrified of what my veterinarian was going to find, I was scared because I had ZERO clue financially what this meant for me, and I was exhausted from lack of sleep and the stress of getting him to me.

I took him home, settled him in and took a nap until my veterinarians office opened. 

By 10am, I had him at my veterinarian. She went over the X-rays that the veterinarian in Tijuana took, and took some additional ones also so she could get a better look. She told me that his bladder was atonic (doesn’t work), so I would have to express his bladder multiple times a day and he did indeed, have nerve damage. She explained that there wasn’t anything that she could do for him, but, if I was open to alternative medicine, he might benefit from acupuncture and physical therapy. It was a long shot, but I promised this little guy I was going to do everything in my power to help him.

I made an appointment at a holistic veterinarian who offered acupuncture. She also had an in-house physical therapist who could work with Mateo. It was a whole new experience going to a holistic vet. I think we are so programmed by western medicine, and many people are not open to trying non-traditional medicine. Overall, it was an amazing experience, and I learned so much from her. It was such a calm, zen-like experience, and her compassion and energy was unlike anything I had experienced in the past.

Mateo had his very first acupuncture session at his initial visit. She also adjusted his tail (he was completely out of alignment). We went to acupuncture once a week for months. We also started physical therapy. Mateo was not a fan of physical therapy because, well, he is a cat. But, I made him push through and do it anyway. He needed every opportunity to walk again, even if he was being stubborn and didn’t like it. His physical therapist was so awesome. We had many conversations about how, in her field, she just works with dogs because people won’t bring their cats in to be worked with. Cats hide their pain remarkably well, but, they can also get things like arthritis and could benefit, just like dogs, from physical therapy.

Through it all, Mateo DID gain some tail function back, which I am very grateful for. I remember the initial appointment with my veterinarian and she said with cats like Mateo, sometimes their tail needs to be amputated. Now, when he’s locked in on a bird, excited or super playful, I can see movement in his tail. He would have never had that if it were not for acupuncture. We went to his holistic veterinarian for acupuncture and physical therapy for 7 months. I recently decided that i no longer think it is benefiting Mateo, so we will be stopping. 

Once I made the decision that Mateo would no longer benefit from acupuncture and physical therapy, it was time to make a decision. After all, the entire reason he was still in foster care was for his rehabilitation. 

I can remember early on, my husband looked at me and he said, “I can see us keeping Mateo”. I just brushed him off, said, “yeah, yeah, yeah… I am just concerned with his rehabilitation right now’. Clearly, he saw the bond that was forming between us. I have always loved Mateo, but I was in that foster parent head space of, my job is to protect, to heal and to prepare. To protect them from any harm, just as every parent does, with human or animal children. To heal them from whatever ailments they might have, and to prepare (vaccines, neuter etc) for their forever families. You just don’t think about adopting yourself, its just not in the playbook. 

From the very beginning, I have always been Mateo’s person. He is always by my side or keeping his eye on me. He trusts me completely. He is afraid of my husband and will come “running” to me if he sees him coming (which I secretly love). My husband has always been the one who the kitties are attracted to, he is the kitten whisperer, so to see Mateo actually afraid of him, cracks me up. My husband is the kindest, gentlest person I’ve ever met, so Mateo being  afraid of him is so ironic. But, when an animal looks at you with those big green eyes, asking you to protect them, you melt a little and do everything in your power to make them feel safe and secure. 

For me, there wasn’t a specific moment when I knew I was going to adopt Mateo, but rather a collection of moments. Every time he scaled my couch to snuggle into the crook ok my arm to nap, every time we worked on his physical therapy and he fought me the whole way, every time he laid by my feet as I was working on my computer, every time he would follow me from room to room, a million little moments just like these. I just knew I couldn’t let him go, we belong together.

I do not look at Mateo different than any other cat. I do not feel bad for him, I don’t give him special treatment or coddle him, just because he can’t walk. I wish more people would adopt cats like Mateo and show all of the people that say that they won’t have “quality of life”, exactly how wonderful their quality of life can actually be!

I struggled with adopting Mateo also because I was afraid people would think if they helped a cat like Mateo, they wouldn’t be able to find them a home and they would have to keep them. I want more people to stand up and help kittens just like Mateo. I honestly feel I could have found Mateo a home…. but, at the end of the day, I could never part with him. When I am selecting homes for my fosters, I often times feel like a matchmaker. I am looking for the perfect forever home for that particular cat or kitten. I do not automatically approve an adoption because someone qualifies, they have to be the perfect match for one another. After all, they will be a part of the family and cats can live past 20 years, it needs to be perfect. 

Mateo and I were that perfect match. He is a part of our family. I guess everyone always knew that… it just took me a little longer to get there.

Continue to follow Mateo’s journey on Instagram @theresidentfurkids